This is a great question!
What all of us need to do is to let our intuition and heart, guide us in every choice. In order to do that we need to unlock this place within ourselves by reflecting on ourselves and letting go of what we hold in our mind.
By doing this, the choices we make will be conscious; we will naturally follow our heart. No choices will be wrong or bad; they will be what they are: the flow of nature.
View life as a feedback mechanism
A good way to start reflecting on yourself is to view life as a feedback mechanism. The outer circumstances are not important in any other way than to give you feedback as to the state of your inner being, your mind. What you experience is only your mind.
For example, let’s say two people experience the same situation. However, the situation will be perceived differently depending on each person’s mind. One person might say it’s nothing special, whereas the other person might think it is very stressful.
Neither person sees the situation as it is. The situation merely reveals what the each person holds in their mind. In this case, the situation stirs up worry and stress within person number 2’s mind, and he can become aware of that.
If we begin to view the outer circumstances in this way, we will quickly start to become conscious of all the things that are going on in our mind. It is a cacophony of different thoughts and emotions that clutter our minds and prevent us from being aware, having joy, clarity, and wisdom.
Time to let go and to level up!
Perhaps certain situations always bring up angry feelings within you. In those cases, you have no awareness or free will. You are like a slave to your aggravated mind. Such a reaction is like an automatic mind program that plays itself out in those situations.
It is now time to let go of the mind, and change your life.
Take every opportunity to reflect on yourself. Let’s say you meet a person, and that meeting brings up feelings telling you that you are not good enough, regrets about something that you said, or jealousy or anger. Reflect on that. See what “mind” you had about that situation, and let it go.
Letting go is easy. Just be aware of your thoughts/feelings and imagine that they dissipate into smoke or burn in a fire. As you do this, the composition of your mind will start to change in the most beautiful way.
By reflecting and letting go, you will grow from every situation. Your mind becomes free and big. Let’s say you let go of the feelings of inferiority that the aforementioned meeting brought up in you. Now you have less of those feelings, and the next time you meet with that person, you will not experience those feelings to the same extent. You have changed.
Thus, letting go of our minds makes us change, see things differently, and act differently. We will no longer repeat the same mistake over and over again and new doors will open.
When we notice we have overcome something, it means that we’ve “beaten” it. We have leveled up, and are ready for the next challenge. Whatever that is, we just repeat the same procedure. Always reflect, look within and see what kind of minds a situation brings up within you, and let go of them. And we grow even further.
This way, all the clutter gradually disappears from your mind, and your true mind will becomes revealed from within. This mind is peaceful no matter what. You have achieved true self-awareness, where your inner state no longer is dictated by outer circumstances. From this place everything is existence and every choice is made in congruence with and as a consequence of nature’s flow.