It is not my profession to provide psychological advice. I am a married mother of two teenage boys. Based on my recent experience, I would like to share with you an interesting example of this question.
We need to be aware that the world we live in can change depending on what we think.
I began writing for Quora in January 2021. Since today is 8th March 2022 I have been regularly sharing my thoughts and daily life on Quora for a little over a year. About a year ago, I signed up for Quora and wrote a few articles.
At the time, I watched many YouTube videos about living a long, healthy, and happy life. This was my goal in life. I was meditating at the time (and still am), and I thought I was good at meditating knowing that meditation, regular exercise, and a healthy diet all increase lifespan. But there was one shocking fact.
Researchers found that mothers of children with chronic diseases or disabilities had short telomeres in DNA, a measure that predicts human lifespan. I had chronic stress at the time when I was browsing through the material on the topic. You could experience negative emotions like anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder, or depression if you were not ready to accept your son was a disability.
In the mirror, my face looked unusually dark, and my back looked hunched and rigid. I thought to myself,
‘I am also the mother of the study, who is chronically stressed. I have short telomeres in my DNA, so I can’t live long. My children will be in good hands if I live long enough.’
A few times, I felt depressed as well when meeting mothers whose children were in the same situation as my son.
News reports show abuse of disabled children and exploitation of disabled workers. I used to feel terrified of the society my son would grow up in because of news like this relentlessly piercing my ears.
I have meditated every day, walked every day, and written two episodes a week on Quora for more than a year now.
As a result, my perspective on the world has changed. Meditation has helped me let go of fear, anxiety, and laziness, and I no longer fear the world or feel sorry for myself.
I do not consider myself a mother of a disabled child. Just a mother. I’m enjoying watching him learn. Recently, he started biking. It seemed like he wouldn’t be able to ride a bike, but my son and I are progressing little by little.
Now the world is not so frightening. Bad things happen to everyone. Only through hardship will we grow.
I see myself smiling brightly in the mirror recently. The laugh isn’t forced, and depression isn’t found anywhere else.
The world is the mirror of my mind. If my mind is depressed, the world is depressed as well, and if my mind is full of happiness, the world is full of happiness. I just threw away my depression, and the world is full of happiness now.
